So I’d been seeing images of the Ramen Burger floating around for a few weeks now, and literally even dreamed of having one. Unfortunately, no place I know of near me makes these magical things, so at around 9 pm tonight, I thought “Fuck it. Gonna make it myself.” And it actually was NOT that hard. So using what I had in my tiny tiny kitchen (because I am way too lazy to go out to the store this late put on pants) I managed to make a really good Southern Style Chicken Sandwich with Ramen Buns.
"HOLD THE FUCK UP, CARA" you may be screaming at your computer, "THAT IS A CHICKEN SANDWICH, NOT A BURGER. YOU HAVE MADE A SANDWICH OF LIES."
Stop screaming, no I haven’t. I live in Atlanta, the Chicken Sandwich is a thing here. A very important thing. And while I didn’t have any ground beef or any other meat to make hamburger patties with, I DID have a bunch of frozen chicken patties, so shut your mouth. ANYWAY, HERE’S WHAT YOU DO:
- You’ll need: a pack of ramen, one egg, pepper, mayo (if you can get it, use Duke’s, because this is a southern style sandwich, and there is some sort of law that says Duke’s just tastes better on a chicken sandwich), sriracha, pickles (I used b&b, but dill is more traditional I suppose), and american cheese. Mmmm. HEY I NEVER SAID THIS WAS A CLASSY SANDWICH. YOU’LL USE THAT CHEAP PROCESSED CHEESE AND BE HAPPY.
- Oh, and a chicken patty.
- And canola oil to fry your magical ramen patties in.
- Get your ramen noodles all nice and cooked. Don’t you dare throw away the flavor packet. Once the noodles are cooked, drain them well, then set them aside to cool to room temp.
- I’m impatient as hell, so I put mine in a bowl and threw them in the fridge
- (away from other food. Don’t ever put hot food in the fridge near other food. You’ll fuck up fragile temperatures and spoil your milk and eggs and shit.)
- While your ramen is cooling, in a small mixing bowl, beat together an egg, half of your ramen seasoning, and as much pepper as you want. I freaking love pepper, so I went crazy. Whisk that shit until the ramen powder is completely dissolved.
- Once your ramen is cool enough, toss it with the egg mixture. Hell, get in there with your hands to make sure all the noodles are well coated. But be gentle, you want the noodles to remain as intact as possible. Caress them, as you would a lover.
- divide your eggy ramen into two round bowls, the size you want your buns. I used a couple of those plastic take away soup container things, which were perfect-o.
- press some plastic wrap over the top of the noodles, then weigh it down with something heavy, like a soup can, and throw those suckers in the fridge.
- These have to sit for a while now so that they don’t just fall apart into an egg-y, noodle-y disaster as soon as you try to fry them. I watched an episode of King of the Hill while I waited. I suggest you do the same. Keep the southern theme going.
- shit this is long, I’ll put the rest under a readmore
“Security camera clips that make the news usually show bad things, but Coke decided to ‘look at the world a little differently’ in this heartwarming viral video. They found security camera footage from around the world showing happy moments: people stealing kisses instead of possessions, dealing potato chips instead of drugs, and offering car assistance rather than road rage.” [x]
I like this video. This is a good video.
LAWS OF NATURE
|—||Maggie Stiefvater, Forever (via creatingaquietmind)|
I CANNOT FECKIN RUN
How am I supposed to kill these poor bastards??
OH MY GOD THEY JUST MULTIPLY. THIS IS AWFUL D:::
ohgod, i’m dying.
Quotes from Peter Pan.
For the dough
- 1 and 3/4 cups all purpose flour
- 1 cup whole wheat flour (you can just use only all purpose flour as well, in that case, it will be in total 2 and 3/4 cups all purpose flour)
- 2 tablespoons flex seed meal (optional)
- 1/4 cup sugar
- 2 and 1/4 teaspoons active dry yeast
- 1/2 teaspoon salt
- 1/4 cup unsalted butter
- 1/3 cup whole milk (2% milk work just fine)
- 1/4 cup water
- 1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
- 2 large eggs, room temperature, lightly beaten together
- 1/4 cup maple syrup
For the filling:
- 1 cup light brown sugar
- 1 pack (6 OZ.) fresh blueberry (you can also use raisin or nuts instead if you want ^_^)
- 2 teaspoons ground cinnamon
- 1/2 teaspoon ground nutmeg
- 1/4 cup unsalted butter, melted until browned
- In a large bowl of stand mixer, with the whisk attachment, whisk together — 1 cup all purpose flour + 1 cup whole wheat flour + flex seed meal + sugar + yeast + salt — set aside.
- In a small saucepan over medium heat, melt together — milk + butter — until butter just melted. Remove from heat then mix in — water + vanilla extract — wait until the temperature of the liquid is between 115 - 125 degrees F.
- Change to paddle attachment, on low speed, pour in the liquid (milk mixture) into the dry ingredients. After well combined, pour in — eggs + maple syrup — at this stage, the dough will fall apart and separate into pieces, just keep going. Add in — 3/4 cup all purpose flour — mix until all come together again. The dough will be a little bit sticky, that’s right.
- Place the dough in a large greased bowl. Cover with clean humid towel. Place in a warm place and let it rest until double in size, about an hour. Note: At stage 4, the dough can be, instead, place in the fridge overnight. Just make sure to take the dough out from the fridge about 30 minutes before rolling.
- While waiting for the dough to rise, in a small bowl, mix together — sugar + cinnamon + nutmeg — set aside
- In a small saucepan (or microwave), melted — 1/4 cup unsalted butter — set aside.
- Grease a loaf pan then set aside.
- Deflate the risen dough and knead the dough a few times with a few tablespoon of flour.
- Cover with a clean humid towel and let rest for 5 minutes.
- On a lightly working surface, roll the dough out into rectangle shape, about 12 inch* 20 inches.
- Spread melted butter all over the surface of the dough. Sprinkle with all of the sugar-cinnamon-nutmeg mixture. Sprinkle blueberry.
- Cut the dough, vertically, into 6 equal-sized strips. Stack the strips on top of one another. Cut the stack into 4 equal-sized slices once again.
- Stand the loaf pan up vertically then gently transfer each stack of the the dough squares into the loaf pan, one over another. Cover with a clean humid towel and let rest again in a warm place for about 45 minutes.
- Preheat oven to 350 F.
- Place loaf in the oven and bake until the top is very golden brown, about 30-35 minutes.
- Remove from the oven and allow to rest for 20 minutes before serving. If you can wait of course ^_^